Thursday, November 15, 2007

COTTON COMES TO HEAVEN (OR NOT)

"Well, it's been a crazy fi'ty years. After I got back to the States, I had a juicy Porterhouse steak cooked medium rare, just the way I likes 'em. Then I knocked around a bit. Eventually I got tired of working for jackasses, and decided to make an honest living installing asbestos in schools and hospitals. Got married twice, one ugly, one hot, and had two sons: Hank, and my baby Good Hank."
- Cotton Hill
'King Of The Hill'

But now Cotton Hill's run is over (not that he could do much running without any shins).

In a rare move for the Tooniverse, a cartoon character has passed away. Cotton Hill was the cantankerous old WWII vet who was the father of the main character on 'King Of The Hill', Hank Hill. While having a flashback to the War at a Japanese restaurant, Cotton accidentally swallowed a shrimp, to which he was deathly allergic.

There have been a couple of minor characters who have passed away on 'The Simpsons', and there was a murder of a one-shot bimbo in 'KOTH'. But for the most part, the residents of the Tooniverse basically can live forever. (Although we haven't seen any of the Flintstones walking around in the modern age.) And in the cases of some, like the Simpsons kids, they never age.

And then there are those characters who do die, but then come back to life. The classic example is Wile E. Coyote. (You can't tell me that he could fall down into the canyon and have the rock ledge and an anvil land on top of him and NOT die!) Others include Hans Moleman on 'The Simpsons' and of course, Kenny from 'South Park' - who died just last night on the show after many episodes in which that classic bit seemed to have been retired.

So Cotton Hill finally got his marching orders, or in his case, his waddling orders. For the most part, 'King Of The Hill' goes for realism in its stories, so it's not likely we'll be seeing that old coot again unless it's in a flashback or a dream sequence.

Here was his online obituary:
Cotton Hill, age 80, World War II veteran, died Sunday in a Texas VA hospital. Hill suffered from several injuries ranging from four rusty bullets lodged in his heart from his military service, a broken hip and torn ligaments in his ankle-knees, to an infection in his esophagus and severe burns caused by a freak shrimp accident that occurred earlier this week at Tokyaki’s Japanese restaurant. Hill leaves behind sons Hank Hill and G.H. (short for “Good Hank”); daughter-in-law Peggy Hill; grandson Bobby Hill; ex-wife Tilly; second wife Didi; first love and former Japanese lover Michiko; an illegitimate Japanese son, Junichiro; and nephew Dusty Hill (of band ZZ Top).

Drinks are on Peggy Hill.....

BCnU....
Toby OB


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