Celebrity Matchmakers

Ava the Diva and Eric Cartman - Love at first site

It's simple really.  We all want, need and crave to love and be loved.  Everyone of us, no matter how big, small, short or tall ~ it's a fact of life.  Yes, even if that person you love is animated...  No I don't mean like Charlie Sheen either where everything they do is overboard and extreme.  What I mean is more like Eric Cartman from Southpark.  He is my one true love.  Anyone who really knows me knows this about me, that I have a crush on the little round fat-head.  What can I say, just the thought of him makes me smile.

The one thing I actually do collect is Southpark stuff, in particular Cartman stuff...  My mom has a birthday cake custom made for me every year in the shape of Cartman. I have a Cartman tattoo on my ankle, about five Cartman dolls, a watch, autographed photos from the creators Matt Parker & Trey Stone, a painting that was made for me of all of the southpark characters... hmm let me see what else?  I have pajamas, t shirts, cards, DVD's, oh gosh... a lot of Cartman stuff lets just put it that way.

Yes I know, he has a potty mouth (disclaimer: it's a grown up cartoon ~ I never said it was a show for kids people).  Sure he eats bad.  Okay he is perpetually stuck in elementary school and I know he does still live with his mom.  Not unlike lots of guys out there...  at least this one makes me laugh.  ;D

So, knowing I can't literally be with the little animated bugger, so I guess the next best thing would be to set him up with none other than "Ava the Diva".  So here are a few questions asked before they actually meet and go on their first date:

1. What draws you to Eric Cartman?

Well, obviously the artist ;o)  But otherwise I really like his cute voice and round face.

2. Why should Cartman choose you to be his girlfriend?

Because I am cute, he loves to sing and I have him tattooed on my ankle.  We are perfect for each other.

3. You love to workout and he loves to eat cheesy poofs.  Is this a conflict for you?

Like they say opposites attract.  He can be my yin and I can be his yang.

4. Where would you want Eric to take you out to eat on your first date together?

The lunchroom duh!  I would love to meet all his friends especially Chef!

5. What adventure would you want to go on with Cartman as his girlfriend?

I would want him to be my partner on "The Amazing Race" so we can travel the world together.  We can explore caverns, leap from tall buildings, race through traffic and win a lot of moola.

In the end, I know no matter what Eric Cartman and Ava the Diva would be a true Celebrity Match made in Heaven.  By the way, if you haven't seen Ava the Diva yet go check her out on my Youtube channel.

Blessings, Love & Music ~
Ava xo

www.avaaston.com

Shut Your Pie Hole

Contestants compete during the Virgin Mobile pie eating competition at Harry's Cafe de Wheels in Sydney, Australia. (July 23, 2008 - Photo by Sergio Dionisio/Getty Images Entertainment)

One of my most favorite sayings is, "Shut Your Pie Hole"

Have you ever wondered where that saying comes from? I did. I found that it is a British term. "The Dictionary of Contemporary Slang" by Tony Thorne, originally published by Bloomsbury Publishing in 1990 says the origin is from the phrase  "cakehole", noun. British meaning "Mouth." It's a slang term which was extremely widespread and considered by many to be vulgar in the 1950s and 1960s. It survives in the inner circles of younger adults, school children and Greek blonde girls. It is also a  common expression by my favorite cartoon character, Cartman on South Park. I laugh out loud just thinking of him saying it. Here is an example:

Stan: Ready? 1, 2, 3, 4!
(Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny start playing the flutes and drum as they march. Cartman starts beating the drum.)
Cartman: Yeah! Do you like to rock?! I like to rock! Hello, Baltimore!
Kyle: Cartman, what the hell are you doing?!
Cartman: I'm playing the drum!(He continues to beat the drum.)
Kyle: You're not supposed to beat the drum, you hit it!
Cartman: You don't hit a drum! You gotta beat the (bleep) out of it! (He starts to beat the drum again.) Shut your pie-hole!

Too funny.

Sometimes I have to alter the phrase to make it appropriate. For instance, I often tell my manager Mr. Bricks, to "shut his Mc Rib hole" because he is always eating the McDonald's McRibs. But, by the size of his expanding waistline, I am sure Bricks also eats his fair share of pies - just sayin'.

I should say that whenever I mention in one of my blogs or on Facebook or Twitter that I like South Park it seems like I always get a few pieces of negative fan mail basically telling me I am going to go to Hell for liking the animated series.  It doesn't matter how many disclaimers I put that it is just a cartoon and it is only entertainment for me and that I don't live my life by it there are always some goodie-two-shoes people who still love to rant about what a bad person I am for being a fan of South Park.

To those people I say, shut your pie hole!

Blessings,

Ava

xox

PS: Don't forget the March Madness Sale on my "Gone" CD. Only $6.99 Plus Free Shipping

South Park Rocks!

I really enjoy a good belly laugh and the one program that I use as my go-to show for a guaranteed laugh, is South Park. South Park first aired on August 13, 1997 and ever since I started watching it as a teenager, I can not even tell you how many countless hours I have wasted laughing at it.  The writing is brilliant and the humor is spot on, I like it because it is like  a rebel show compared to the other animated shows.  I'm Greek and I am a rocker chick, I kind of like rebels. Let me also say, that if you have been living under a rock, or locked away in an attic or haven't watched any television for the past 13 years, let me warn you that South Park is not a cartoon for young children. With that said, as a fan of animation, I am glad to see some adult fare like South Park on TV to keep us all from totally losing every aspect of our childhood.

Of all of the characters, Cartman is my favorite and he is one of the four main characters of South Park.  I can totallay identify with him on so many levels. He is voiced by Trey Parker, one of the co-creators of the show. Cartman can best be described as a fat, spoiled, foul-mouthed, mean-spirited, sociopathic, selfish, and ill-tempered fourth-grader. Dang, if that doesn't also describe my manager, Mr. Bricks in a nutshell.

Cartman's full name is Eric Theodore Cartman and he lives with his mother in the fictional town of South Park, where he commonly has extraordinary experiences that are typical of living in a small town. While taking things that are going on in the news politics, music, etc. and poking a little fun in a silly sarcastic unique way.  It's kinda like my day-to-day muckery. Now you can see why I can identify with him so much, can't you?

It has been said that Cartman is one of the most popular characters on the show.  Also, along with Beaver Cleaver, Herman Munster and Lassie, Cartman remains one of the most recognizable and iconic television characters ever.

The co-creators of the show Trey Parker and Matt Stone describe Cartman as "a little Archie Bunker", and state that he is also their favorite character, and the one with whom they most identify.

Ok, how big of fan am I of Cartman? Besides being able to do a very mean Cartman voice, there is my my rocking Cartman Collection (yes I do collect Cartman dolls, T-shirts, photos, stickers and basically anything with him on it). Well, I also happen to have tattoo of him just above my ankle:

How's that for dedication? I guess I will know I have made it in the music industry when someone comes up to me after one of my performances  and then shows me they have tatted my name on some part of their body. I just hope my name is never inked on anyone's butt.   Do not get any ideas Mr. Bricks.  Just the thought of that makes me vomit a little in my mouth.

And for  every birthday since I started watching the show,  my Mom has a had Cartman birthday cake made special for me every year:

If you have never had the guilty pleasure of watching the show go to  www.Hulu.com or YouTube and start watching. I give it two thumbs up and I think you will too. Before anyone sends me a bunch of emails or nasty~grams - I realize it is just a TV show.  I do not live my life by or build my morals around it.  It is funny & makes me laugh ~ and if you can't laugh in life, especially in today's crazy world you might as well be 6 ft. under. 'nuff said.

Blessings,

Ava

xox

A side note: I will be one of the voices of the cartoon rats  for a new animated children's series called  TRPOH: The Rat Pack of Hollywood. All of the rats sing, so I get to act and sing. Yippie for me. More details as it becomes available.

www.avaaston.com