I Saw My First UFO Today

UFO captured in photo of recording artist Ava Aston

As I approach writing my 200th blog (yea me) I was going through some photos that I thought I could use to accentuate my writing. Maybe I was just being a lazy Greek girl today, but I figured that if a picture is worth a 1,000 words so why couldn't I post a picture today and call it good?

But it couldn't just be any picture. It must be a picture that gets people talking. A picture that makes a blog go viral. Maybe a picture of me and a furry animal? Wait, I recently posted a photo of me and the abandoned donkey, so I needed something else. I'm a good Greek girl so posting a picture of me prancing around in my underpants wasn't an option. If I have said it here once, I have said it a thousand times - I am not a Kardashian! They are Armenian and I am Greek. Other than the hair color, the biggest difference is in the genes - jeans. I keep mine on for photo shoots and they take them off - just sayin'.

Posting a picture instead of writing for your blog is not a bad thing. I have seen many amazing blogs that post a picture and call it good.  I would like to recommend and give a shout out to my new blog friend, Frizztext who does that very successfully. His post of a dog sitting on a sofa ignoring all of the cat photos around him is my favorite! You can see Frizztext's blog here: Frizztext blog

I titled my blog "I Saw My First UFO Today" because in my coconut it is just as important to have a really cool title as it is having an amazing photo and/or amazing words.

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Isn't it Ironic?

I was working out and listening to a little Alanis Morissette and I thought to myself, isn't this ironic - I am a singer and while I am working out, I am listening to another singer and somewhere in the world there was someone else working out while listening to one of my songs...(at least I hope there is.)

Life is full of ironies. Sometimes the irony is an old law that is still on the books.

• In Maryland a woman cannot go through her husband’s pockets while he is sleeping. Not even if she really wants a piece of gum or "borrow" $200 for a new pair of sneakers
• In Tucson, Arizona, women are not allowed to wear pants. No word on the stance on booty shorts,thongs or going commando.
• In Carrizozo, New Mexico, it is illegal for a woman to appear unshaven under their arms in public. Why doesn't Manhattan have such a law on its books - just sayin'

Other ironies are just a fact of life.

• Everyone has a photographic memory to some degree. However my manager Mr. Bricks doesn't appear to have any film.
• Whenever I need to use a flashlight my batteries are dead. Whenever I need a battery I am out of that size of battery. This irony holds true for light bulbs.
• It was recently discovered that doing research caused cancer in rats.
• Keeping up with Kardashians is called a reality series, but nothing about it reflects reality at all.

Its ironic that shoppers at Wal Mart didn't notice the original price

I have also noticed that the muckery in my life is filled with ironies.

• I eat healthy, work out and I am in good health. My manager Mr. Bricks eats Mc Ribs at McDonald's, doesn't work out and  his blood pressure is higher than the national debt.
• It was 60° the other day in New York so I started putting away my gloves, uggs and puffy winter jacket and I was going to bring out the spring sneakers. Yesterday it snowed 8 inches and the high was only about 10 degrees.
• I am Greek and Blonde, yet I still have a good coconut on my shoulders.
• Days I plan on running errands I get called for meetings and auditions. On days I have nothing to do and would like an audition the phone never rings.

I have a manager with one lazy eye. But I do not yet have a record deal....isn't that ironic?

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Black Eyed Peas

A Bowl of Black Eyed Peas

So, my manager Mr. Bricks is still monitoring my blog for inappropriate content. Not inappropriate content in a sexual content sort of way, (although I am sure he would cop-a-peek) but no worries on that, this Blonde Greek Girl doesn't roll like that!  Unlike the Kardashian girls who seem to be allergic to clothes because they are always taking them off. But that is not my style. I believe I can be just as beautiful fully clothed in my comfy t-shirt, jeans and favorite sneakers as I could be butt-ass naked - just sayin'

The inappropriate content that Mr. Bricks is looking for from me is when I open my big fat Greek mug and say something that might offend my CD buying fans. He doesn't want me to get too political because he says common sense will tell you that 50% of the people will disagree with whatever I say. Mr. Bricks also doesn't want me criticizing other entertainers because he thinks that will make me look bad and look like I might be jealous of an opportunity they got that I did not. He calls it sour grapes, leave it to Mr. Bricks to bring everything back around to some sort of food. No wonder he has an issue with his weight.

So to make Mr. Bricks one  happy man with one lazy eye, I will be speaking in code today.

So, does anyone like those Black Eyed Peas? (Wink Wink.) Myself, I think they are kinda boring. There are so many other "vegetables" that are better. I know many people are fans of Black Eyed Peas, especially in the south.

Some people like their Black Eyed Peas with rice. Personally, you could put a black leather mini skirt and a bazillion sequins on Black Eyed Peas (wink wink) and I still wouldn't get the fascination with them.  I love to work out to make sure I look good on stage when I sing, so I know a little bit about the "veggies" I speak about.

There are certain times like say, New Year's Eve or maybe even the Super Bowl half time show here it is a tradition to have a healthy dose of Black Eyed Peas.  It is supposed to bring you good luck. Well, I had a healthy dose of Black Eyed Peas recently and I don't feel any luckier. Nauseous maybe, but not lucky. In fact my stomach is going "Boom Boom Pow." So, "I gotta feeling" that is not a good thing.

For those of you who like Black Eyed Peas, I'm not out to change your mind. We are all entitled to our tastes and opinions. They just are not for me. But don't worry about me because big girls don't cry, I will be fine. I will just look for other "veggies" that I like and no, don't worry I have already tried "carrot tops" and I am not crazy about that either.

Say no to Carrott Tops

Blessings,

Ava.i.am

xox

Tough Questions

Happy snowy Saturday from me to you!!   I hope you enjoy a little fun as I ask my manager Mr. Bricks some very tough questions in today's cartoon. Enjoy.

Blessings,

Ava

xox

Singing The Reality Stars Blues

Kim Kardashian Singing Star?

Do you really want to see this Greek girl go ballistic? Then give me tickets to a future Kim Kardashian concert. Yah, that's right Kim Kardashian now thinks she is a singer! Kim and Kanye West are putting the record together with the help of The-Dream, aka Terius Youngdell Nash. The-Dream is without a doubt the most talented R & B writer, producer, artist out there today! I just wonder why he would be working with Kim. I think I know why, butt....I'm not really sure. (spelling error intentional)

Now I can not really comment on Kim Kardashian's singing voice yet because I haven't heard her sing. And I am sure in real life she is a nice enough girl. So I will reserve my big fat Greek opinion on her ability to do so, until after I actually do. So why did Kim Kardashian get a record deal? I don't think she has been spending years in vocal lessons and working on her craft....butt, she does have a reality series. (spelling error intentional)

This is not the first time the record industry has tried to strike gold by signing a reality star to a record deal. Paris Hilton went down that road. In 2006 she released her debut album called Paris. Domestically it sold fewer than 500,000 copies, but internationally it sold 2.3 million copies. I should note that she has not recorded any additional music, but continues to release music videos. I guess she got the memo that the world would rather SEE Paris Hilton, than HEAR Paris Hilton.

More recently two of the ladies on the "Housewives of..." reality series released CD's.

Real annoying housewives Luann de Lesseps, aka "The Countess" and Kim "Tardy for the Party" Zolciak 

Depending on how much you like to watch your ears bleed or enjoy watching an automobile wreck on the Palisades Parkway The Greek Girl personally invites you to listen to the fine musical stylings that have come from these two-over inflated, ego-driven reality stars.

Money Can't Buy You Class. It just goes to show that money might not be able to buy you class, talent or a good singing voice, but it sure can buy you a record deal! Can you hear me now Kim Kardashian? Hang on, I just vomited a little in the back of my throat. There's so much electronic muckery going on with LuAnn's voice it just makes me sick.

But Luann's voice will seem like butter (rancid movie theatre butter at that) compared to listening to Atlanta Housewife Kim Zolciak's song, "Tardy For The Party." Here you be the judge:

OK, I can't take any more of this Muckery.... Mr. Bricks, I want a record deal and I want it NOW! Or get me a reality series Mr. Bricks so I will the get a record deal - just sayin'

Blessings,

Ava

xox