Monday, October 31, 2005

A HAT SQUAD REVISION

In a story about the young actress who was brutally murdered outside her home, the L.A. Times provided this information about the 'Judging Amy' character played by Tara Correa-McMullen:

She played a troubled and remorseless teenager, Graciela Reyes, who had been abandoned by her mother and two brothers who had fled to Guatemala. Judge Amy, played by Amy Brenneman, tries to turn Graciela's life around, but the teen gets involved in a drive-by shooting. Judge Amy attempts to prevent Graciela from being tried as an adult. She fails, but almost succeeds in getting her a new trial when Graciela is murdered in prison.

So there never was a chance for the character to ever return, should 'Judging Amy' have been revived in a sequel or reunion movie. And so Toobworld Central can safely claim that Graciela Reyes was kin to Hugo Reyes of 'Lost', and thus was a victim of the Numbers Curse.

It's just a shame that it's Ms. Correa-McMullen's death that protects that claim, and not the fancies of the script-writers.

BCnU.....
Tele-Toby

RECASTAWAYS - "GUIDING LIGHT"

Carolyn Hinsey, who is an editor for "Soap Opera Weekly", wrote this in Friday's New York Daily News:

A blackout hits Springfield next week on 'Guiding Light' (CBS, 10 a.m.), but look closely. When the lights go out, Cassie will be played by Laura Wright, who has jumped ship to play Carly on 'General Hospital.' When they come back on, Cassie will be portrayed by newcomer Nicole Forester.

Obviously, within the framework of the show's inner reality, the blackout is somehow connected with this recastaway. I suspect an alien abduction; something along the lines of the alien impregnation of a town's female population in "Children Of The Damned".

The alien Cassie will be able to project the aura of the original Cassie using technology similar to that of the Quantum Leap system; so that people looking at her will not be able to tell the difference. But the audience viewing at home will be able to see the new Cassie.

Whatever her reason for being here in Springfield, the new Cassie will never give herself away to any of the others on the show. For all that we see of her on screen, Cassie will continue Life as if she were the real deal.

That would be my splainin, anyway.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

CROSSOVER OF THE WEEK!

"The answer goes beyond the realm of History,
Into the realm of Legend....."

Professor Samantha Gaines
"Cerberus"

I thought the Crossover of the Week would have to rely once again on the League of Themselves - and from 'The King of Queens' again at that.

But the gods answered my prayer for something completely different. Literally.

(Not that the crossover I originally had in mind was so bad, even if it was a bit Zonk!ish. But now I can save that for where it truly belongs - as part of tomorrow's tribute to the November inductee into the TV Crossover Hall of Fame!)

On Saturday, Sci-Fi Channel presented a made for TV movie "Cerberus". In the story, a comely young professor of antiquities from the Van Buren Museum of Art needed to save her scalawag of a brother. To do so, Professor Gaines teamed up with a squad of First Gulf War vets in an attempt to regain the Sword of Mars from their former comrade-in-arms, a mercenary named Cutter.

Cutter's theft of the sword from the tomb of Attila the Hun unleashed the wrath of Cerberus, the three-headed dog from Hell, upon the world. (Or at least upon a small village in Romania.)

In Toobworld, mythology is the real deal. It's not just legend; it's not a fractured fairy tale. The gods of Olympus and Asgard have just as much legitimacy in Earth Prime Time as witches married to mortals, Martians stranded in Los Angeles, eloquent equines, and maternal units reborn as automobiles.

Apollo clashed with the Enterprise crew in an episode of 'Star Trek'. Thor battled 'The Incredible Hulk'. And Hermes worked his magic for a New England college's football team. (Within the "reality" of Toobworld, 'Olympus 7-0000' was probably presented as a musical because of the demonic influence of Mr. Sweet from 'Buffy The Vampire Slayer'.)

And yes, I know Thor is from the Norse myths of the Elder Eddas, from the land of those crinkly fjords. Be thankful I didn't dredge up Hanuman the Monkey God! At least I can tie Thor into all of this.

Hrmmmm...... Now that I've mentioned a Viking god, I've suddenly got this hankering for Spam......

Anyway, looming large in the pantheon is the demigod who had several of his own TV series to his credit, both in the main Toobworld and in the Tooniverse - Hercules!

"Cerberus"
&
"Hercules In The Underworld"
&
'Hercules: The Legendary Journeys'

It's Kevin Sorbo's portrayal of the Son of Zeus that is the "official" representative of the character for Toobworld. And by "official", I mean "Because I say so." By extension, Ryan Gosling as 'Young Hercules' exists in the same dimension, being just the younger version of Sorbo's character. The Hercules who looks like actor Paul Telfer, as seen in the NBC mini-series 'Hercules', belongs to a different TV dimension. He's probably from Earth Prime Time Delay but not from the evil mirror universe, as Kevin Sorbo assayed that role in a few episodes of his own series.

As for Brian Thompson's portrayal of Hercules in the mini-series 'Jason And The Argonauts', I feel comfortable leaving that in the main Toobworld. That's because he wasn't the true Hercules; rather he was an alien bounty hunter assuming the demigod's identity, thousands of years before he would resurface again in 'The X-Files'.

Before Kevin Sorbo settled into a weekly series as the Son of Zeus, his Hercules was introduced in a series of five tele-flicks. One of these was "Hercules In The Underworld", in which we saw the dramatization of one of the twelve labors of Hercules - the capture of Cerberus, that "three-headed, mean-assed, bad-breathed dog" from Hell (as described in Saturday's TV movie.)

The mythology of Toobworld differs from the mythology of the Real World; as it should, just like all aspects of Life in TV Land. In the established myth, Hercules had to retrieve Cerberus from Hades without benefit of weapons as one of twelve tasks for King Eurystheus of Tiryns. To do so, Hercules put a choke hold on each of the three heads until the devil-dog finally passed out.

But in the TV movie, Hercules was in the Underworld to save a village from the escaping souls near a Hellmouth. And while down there he recaptured Cerberus as a favor for his half-brother Hades. But to do so, he simply restrained the beastie and then talked soothingly to him. (As he reminded the others with him, "sometimes a little kindness does the trick.")

Perhaps we didn't see it because he used sleight of hand, but I'll bet Herc slipped Cerberus an Olympian-sized Doggie Downer while restraining him!

As for the story that became the established legend? That was most likely due to the story told by Hercules' mortal brother Iphicles who would often pass himself off as his own brother in order to cadge drinks in the taverns:

“Hades was worse than your foulest nightmare. It was pitch black -- sweltering hot -- and evil lurking around every corner. So I had to find Cerberus, the three-headed dog? And bring him back to King Eurystheus -- without using any weapons. No! No! No! Really!

So -- using nothing more than my bare hands -- I choked this biting, clawing, fire-breathing beast -- and I dragged him outta Hades!

The thing is -- the king didn't want this monster! I mean, who would? So I had to turn around and take him back!”

Hercules and Cerberus met again a few years later when the demigod once again ventured into his half-brother's underworld realm to rescue Persephone, as ordered by her mother Demeter. But this time, their encounter was a violent clash. (Hercules was probably in no mood to be gentle this time around since he knew his now-deceased wife Deianeira and their children were "guests" of Hades in Hades.)

Thousands of years later, Samantha Gaines and Jake Adams could have used the help of Hercules as they struggled to defeat Cerberus. And had he been in the area of Strajerul, Romania, perhaps Herc might have done so. That's because - as established in 'Hercules: The Legendary Journeys', - Hercules still lives in the mortal world today... known as the actor Kevin Sorbo!

Other links could be made to "Cerberus", if only thematically. Professor Gaines and her quest for magical antiquities like the Breastplate of Attila and the Sword of Mars would make her an excellent candidate to work with "The Librarian", the character Noah Wyle played in a TV movie (for which he's apparently making a sequel).

Actually, we never did find out who Jake and his friends worked for - was it for the American government as "black ops", or for an international organization like 'U.N.C.L.E.'? Or maybe they also worked for "the Library".

Since she mentioned Hitler's obsession with the occult, there's always the possibility that Samantha Gaines knew Professor Henry Jones, Jr., whose presence was established in Toobworld thanks to the 'Young Indiana Jones Chronicles'.

Jake Adams and his buddies Burke and Willis, along with their nemesis Cutter, all served together fifteen years before in the Gulf War. While there in Iraq, they might have met former government scientist Paul Turner who appeared in his own series, 'Strange World'. And they may have actually fought against a member of the Iraqi Republican Guard named Sayid Jarrah, who is now 'Lost' after the crash of Oceanic Flight 815.

And finally, - and this one is really off the wall! - we never learned what Cutter's full name was. We never even learned whether or not "Cutter" was just a nickname; his prowess with the Sword of Mars seemed to indicate that the bloodthirsty mercenary was certainly at ease with a blade.

So what if Cutter was in fact a former trucker by the name of BJ McKay? We haven't seen him in Toobworld since 1981; maybe during that off-screen period he was lured over to the dark side after the death of his simian sidekick known as "The Bear".

I know if any of my chimp buddies got killed off, I'd be pretty bleeped off as well. Unless it's a guy I work with, who is descended from Hanuman the Monkey God. Him, I wouldn't miss.

There you go, making me mention Hanuman. I warned you not to let that happen! Now that I'm thinking about my jerk of a coworker, I feel a Maalox Moment coming on........

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

"He who lies down with dogs gets up with fleas."
Herman Munster
'The Munsters'

Sunday, October 30, 2005

THE HAT SQUAD: TARA CORREA-McMULLEN

Teen actress Tara Correa-McMullen, who portrayed a former gang member in the TV show 'Judging Amy,' was shot to death amid gang violence, police said.

Authorities in Inglewood, a suburb south of Los Angeles, said the actress was shot several times as she stood outside an apartment complex Oct. 21. Two men with her were wounded.

No suspects have been identified in the shooting, which is believed to be gang-related, police said.

"She may have just been at the wrong place at the wrong time," said Sgt. Steve Overly said.

After filming her first movie, "Rebound," which was released this summer, Correa-McMullen won a recurring role on 'Judging Amy' as a former gang member named Graciela.
[edited from the AP report]

Her list of credits [from IMDb.com]:

'Zoey 101' playing "Ridgeway Girl #1" in episode: "Disc Golf" (episode # 1.11) 10 April 2005
'Judging Amy' playing "Graciela" in episode: "My Name Is Amy Gray ..." (episode # 6.22) 3 May 2005
in episode: "Getting Out" (episode # 6.21) 26 April 2005
in episode: "Sorry I Missed You" (episode # 6.18) 5 April 2005
in episode: "Hard to Get" (episode # 6.15) 8 March 2005
in episode: "Dream a Little Dream" (episode # 6.13) 15 February 2005
in episode: "10,000 Steps" (episode # 6.11) 25 January 2005
in episode: "Silent Era" (episode # 6.9) 11 January 2005
in episode: "Lullaby" (episode # 6.2) 12 October 2004

'Judging Amy' has ceased production, but there's always the chance someday that the characters may be brought back for a reunion movie. Sadly, Ms. Correa-McMullen's character would have to be recast due to her murder. (A similar situation happened back in the 1970s when Barbara Colby was murdered soon after beginning work on 'Phyllis'. Her character of Julie Erskine, who only appeared in the first episode, was quickly recast with Liz Torres.)

Life goes on in Toobworld after the shows stopped broadcasting, so Graciela Reyes may still be alive in the TV Universe even though the actress who played her has died. We just can't see it played out.

But if there was a chance for this Hartford-based series to return someday, I would hope they would honor the young actress' memory by not recasting the role. Instead, they should splain away her absence in an honorable fashion - even if it meant saying that she had died, - as a fitting tribute to her memory.

It's always possible that Graciela Reyes is somehow related to Hugo Reyes. Even though they are separated by the continental United States (Graciela lives in Hartford, Ct., and Hugo is in Los Angeles.), they still could have been cousins.

If Graciela Reyes has indeed passed away off-screen to preserve the character as being played only by Ms. Correa-McMullen, then it could be another sign that Hugo's supposed Curse of the Numbers still afflicts his family even though he himself has been 'Lost' for over a year......

In any event, I hope her killer(s) are soon found and brought to justice.

BCnU......
Tele-Toby

Saturday, October 29, 2005

HI HONEY, I'M HOLMES! (PART TWO)

There have been over a hundred alternate TV dimensions seen, thanks mostly to 'Sliders', but also due to 'Futurama', 'Star Trek', and the various science fiction anthology series.

And each of them is home to Holmes.

Currently there are a handful of "active" dimensions, thanks to the popularity of working the White House into so many different TV series. (All of the other dimensions are still out there, but they're just not being seen at present, much like so many TV characters after their shows have been canceled.)

So after the dimensions of the main Toobworld, the evil mirror version, and Earth Prime-Time Delay, home of the remakes, all of the other dimensions can be summed up pretty much by who's the POTUS for each of them. For each of them, I've assigned a Sherlock Holmes.

First off, a recap of the Big Three dimensions:

EARTH PRIME-TIME
Jeremy Brett (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . "Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, The" (1984) TV Series
. . . "Casebook of Sherlock Holmes, The" (1990) TV Series
. . . "Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes, The" (1994) TV Series
. . . "Return of Sherlock Holmes, The" (1986) TV Series
. . . Eligible Bachelor, The (1993) (TV)
. . . Hound of the Baskervilles, The (1988) (TV)
. . . Last Vampyre, The (1993) (TV)
. . . Master Blackmailer, The (1992) (TV)
. . . Sign of Four, The (1987) (TV)

EARTH PRIME-TIME (EVIL MIRROR)
Alan Wheatley (II) (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . "Sherlock Holmes" (1951) (mini) TV Series

EARTH PRIME-TIME DELAY
Ronald Howard (I) (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . "Sherlock Holmes" (1954) TV Series

And now on to the other dimensions, not only of sight but sound......

TOOBWORLD OF 'THE WEST WING'
Douglas Wilmer (Sherlock Holmes (1965)
. . . "Sherlock Holmes" (1965) TV Series
. . . Adventure of Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother, The (1975)

Yet another series which debuted on Television nearly twenty years before the Sherlock Holmes chosen to be the official representative for the main Toobworld. So in order to honor Mr. Wilmer's contribution to Sherlockiana, we've assigned his TV series to the dimension which houses the finest show about the ideal of Washington politics.

And don't hold the fact that he portrayed the Great Detective in the Gene Wilder comedy against him. First off, that's a different universe, let alone a dimension, and has no bearing on Toobworld. And secondly, Mr. Wilmer conducted himself with dignity in his portrayal of Holmes while all about him were operating at the same level of Mr. Wilder's manic high.

TOOBWORLD OF 'COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'
Peter Cushing (Sherlock Holmes (1968))
. . . "Sherlock Holmes" (1965) TV Series
. . . Hound of the Baskervilles, The (1959)
. . . Masks of Death, The (1984) (TV)

For the final year of that 1960s TV series about Sherlock Holmes, the character was portrayed by noted genre actor Peter Cushing. He had earlier assayed the role in a Hammer film about the most famous of Holmes' cases, ("The Hound Of The Baskervilles"), and would return to the role in his penultimate performance ("The Masks Of Death").

In its final year, 'The West Wing' has been joined by a rival show about the White House and its occupants - ABC's 'Commander-In-Chief', starring Geena Davis as the first female President. There have been a lot of articles out there comparing the two shows, weighing their merits and debits, as there might have been when Mr. Cushing took over the role of Holmes from Mr. Wilmer. That's why I've assigned his year of the series to the same dimension as 'Commander-In-Chief'.

[By the way, that's how I got around splainin the recastaway of Holmes in that series. Rather than blather on about Quantum leaps or plastic surgery or alien abductions, the change in appearance was due to the viewpoint coming from an entirely different dimension.]

TOOBWORLD OF '24'
Matt Frewer (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . Case of the Whitechapel Vampire, The (2002) (TV)
. . . Hound of the Baskervilles, The (2000) (TV)
. . . Royal Scandal, The (2001) (TV)
. . . Sign of Four, The (2001) (TV)

This world, in which a single day is played out over an entire season, always feels a bit off to me. Even with the time constraint of having each hour show be an hour in real time, certain actions are still edited down to go faster than reality and yet the producers still found a need to include certain time-filler/killer subplots to stretch it out to a full 24 hours.

So I can think of no better portrayal of Holmes that conveyed the same sense of being... not-quite-right than Matt Frewer in these four TV movies based on the Conan Doyle novels and short stories.

TOOBWORLD OF ''PRISON BREAK'/'THE AGENCY'/'THE DISTRICT'
Geoffrey Whitehead (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . "Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson" (1980) TV Series

It's not because this series was produced in Poland, (which I couldn't resist mentioning however!), but this series wasn't very highly regarded. I'm not saying then that this is the reason it should be set in a world where Patricia Wettig is an evil Vice-President; but Mr. Whitehead's ineffectual performance might have contributed to this dimension being such an overall downer.

TOOBWORLD OF THE MOVIES OF THE WEEK
Christopher Lee (I) (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . Incident at Victoria Falls (1991) (TV)
. . . Sherlock Holmes and the Leading Lady (1992) (TV)
. . . Sherlock Holmes und das Halsband des Todes (1962)

I designated an alternate dimension for all of those TV movies in which there was a fictional President of the United States rather than the Real World Commander In Chief at the time. And surprisingly, the chronological timeline matched up pretty well - so long as they all served only one term in office. (And some of them had to die in office after the TV movie ended, to be replaced by their Vice President - that was for those TV movies that followed too quickly on the heels of the preceding POTUS.)

So of all the Holmes portrayed in more than one TV movie (my only criteria for consideration), Christopher Lee stands head and shoulders above all the others. And considering the fact that he's about six foot seven, we can take that literally!

The only other actor I seriously considered was Stewart Granger, who portrayed Holmes in a true ABC Movie Of The Week back in the mid-1970s. But the addition of a theatrical appearance as Holmes capped it for Mr. Lee, even though I will always think of him as Sherlock's brother Mycroft in the Billy Wilder film "The Private Life Of Sherlock Holmes".

Finally.....

TOOBWORLD OF 'THAT'S MY BUSH!'
John Cleese (Sherlock Holmes)
. . . Elementary My Dear Watson (1973) (TV)
John Cleese (Arthur Sherlock Holmes)
. . . Strange Case of the End of Civilization as We Know It, The (1977)

This dimension is populated by shows in which several real-world Presidents are portrayed as absolute morons: 'That's My Bush!', and 'The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer'.....(which concerned the presidency of Abraham Lincoln).

It's Cleese's turn as the grandson Arthur Sherlock Holmes that seals the fate of his performances to banishment into this realm.

So that concludes the look at Sherlock Holmes in the POTUS-driven TV dimensions. There are still other actors to consider in future articles.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

Friday, October 28, 2005

SULU-LA-LA!

George Takei, who as helmsman Sulu steered the Starship Enterprise through three television seasons and six movies, has come out as a homosexual in the current issue of Frontiers, a biweekly gay and lesbian Los Angeles magazine.
- news story

You gotta figure the staff at David Spade's Show Business Show are poring over all of the old 'Star Trek' episodes in hopes of finding that one key scene to lampoon Mr. Takei's statement.

There'll probably be lots of shots from that episode where Sulu was shirtless and covered with a sheen of sweat..........

Good luck to you, Mr. Takei. Coming out must have been hard enough; to do so when you know there are jerks like me out there thinking of ways to make fun of your admission marked real bravery.

Live long and prosper.

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

Thursday, October 27, 2005

RECENT ACQUISITIONS

Picked up a few new boots today to add to the Library here at Toobworld Central.

'Bourbon Street Beat' - I've never seen this series, but I have seen some of its characters in other shows. As part of the WB stable of detective shows back in the late fifties, 'Bourbon Street Beat' was able to ride the coat-tails of shows like '77 Sunset Strip' and 'Hawaiian Eye' via crossovers. Not for long though - the show didn't last.

But the character of Rex Randolph moved on to join '77 Sunset Strip' and Kenny Madison headed over to 'Surfside Six'.

I picked up this disc (containing the episodes "Torch Song For Trumpet" and "Secret Of The Hyacinth Bayou", both from 1959) just to see the location shots used from New Orleans; considering how much was lost not only through the decades, but in just the flooding of this year.

'Science Fiction Theater' - This anthology series predated 'The Twilight Zone'. In it, the stories were based on theories and ideas culled from actual scientific data available at that time.

The episodes are "Facsimile", "Killer Tree", "Gravity Zero", "Magic Suitcase", "Bolt Of Lightning", "Strange Lodger", and "Sound That Kills".

'Manimal' - Please don't look at me like that. This disc contains not only the 90 minute pilot for this series about a man who could turn into animals, but also an episode of 'Nightman' in which the Manimal showed up in a crossover. (The cover of the disc calls the second series 'Darkman' in error.)

'Unaired Pilots Volume Three' - There are four shows on this disc that are more familiar in other incarnations. But each of them should yield plenty of interesting essays and theories for this televisiologist.

Included:
'Wilbur Pope & Mr. Ed'
'Gilligan's Island'
'It's A Small World' (became 'Leave It To Beaver')
"Seven Against The Sea" (as part of 'Fred Astaire's Premier Theatre' and which would later become 'McHale's Navy')

I'll let you know what kind of nuggets I find in these shows.....

BCnU!
Tele-Toby

Many many photos

It's really quite a freaky amount!!!!!!! Haha, never mind, while you read it will load. This is like 5 days worth of blog photos? :)

Don't worry people, I am fine, really. During the KL debacle, for example, my distress level was around 6/10... It consisted of a mixture of mainly indignance, anger, helplessness, and also disappointment.

This time, my distress level is maybe... I dunno, 3/10? I still went out playing DotA with Kelvin and co (and got my head pawned for many, many times), and the way they insulted Kimberly (oh you should have heard Kelvin, he is fabulous) and Peter was fucking hilarious. I love it!!!

Afterall, I know for sure I didn't do anything wrong this time, who gives a flying fuck about people who think I did?

If truth be told, prior to this incident, Voxy did tell me they didn't like the use of vulgarities on the blog.

That made me feel highly discomfitted.

They also stated that my recent entries "have changed" and that I, I quote, "unfortunately, (she) has since stopped producing such constructive topics and has started scolding vulgarities all over her blog". Ahhh... They failed, of course, to notice that my virgin entry was meant for insulting my classmates and the 3rd entry had the word "cheebye" in it.

My point is not that I don't have constructive topics and that I scold vulgarities (all the time) of course, but that I have never changed.

My blog is not a deep thought-provoking place, and it has never pretended to be.

So all in all, I am relieved.

Of many things.

One, I am happy I can now scold as much vulgarities as I want, because I don't have to account to anyone afterall. Localbrand, well, does not agree with my views (T thinks it is a right not a privilege), but essentially, he understands that I did not do anything malicious nor harmed anyone, so it is my business if I want to have a different opinion, and he respects that.

The other thing that makes me feel relieved is the feeling of blackmail being totally gone now. I hate the fact that people have a handle to pull when they want to threaten me to behave in the way they want me to, and now that there are no handles, I am completely free again.

Of course, you can still try to write to Localbrand ... But notice the little change in the banner? Yes. You can try... =) Thanks T, you've been great.

I must say a big thank you to my supporters though. You guys have been ... very nice. I may not have a beefy boyfriend protecting me, but you all are doing pretty good too! :)

I must say, don't boycott (insert brands) just because you think they have done an injustice to me. That is being as juvenile as the detractors, isn't it?

If their products and services are good, they are good, so go to them. I really STILL think they are marvellous brands, else I won't have agreed to endorse them.

Voxy will still be sponsoring my nails (I haven't decided if I will go though), while Kimage hasn't stopped the endorsement, but have just requested for the link to be taken down temporarily. (Yes, I misunderstood them too)

Speaking of Kimage - there are certain websites which proclaim to have "reproduced", in its entirety, the contents of Kimage's response to their hatemails.

Monica (director) called me and she was very angry indeed, because those were not her words. They are distorted beyond recognition.

If you are that herpes-infected, shiveled owner of that website, I suggest you take down the "letter" now, because Kimage can sue you, and will sue you. *Ahem*

And yup, life goes on!!!

ABBIE'S FIRST BIRTHDAY!!!


Isn't it so amazing? ABBIE IS BORN ON HER MOMMY'S BIRTHDAY!

Shuyin and I draw a banner for Abbie and Mommy (with the leftover paint for Weili's birthday banner).


Shuyin draws blue flowers...


Mine in pink...


Words by me too! Walt disney font!


When I arrived, the little baby was sleeping...




Such an angel.

In the morning, we all woke up early to eat Macdonalds breakfast, courtesy of the birthday woman, Mdm Mok! (who is Shuyin's cousin)



Put Abbie on Ronald... :D

After that, we started to blow bigass pink and white balloons, with golden super curly ribbons! The secret to curling ribbons is to use a knife. A slightly blunt knife, and be sure to cover your fingers with a cloth first.

In fact, my ribbons were *too* curly. Bet YOUR ribbons suck. SMIRK!

Shuyin and her sister Qibin (called Binbin affectionately) started engulfing poor Abbie with the balloons!!! I didn't see coz I was sleeping. Heehee. WHAT! Cannot sleep after eating breakfast meh?!







Poor baby... I see the way she play with the balloons I also damn scared...

After that, Shuyin they all woke me up forcefully to help with the decorations.



Shuyin putting up balloons. IT WAS SUPER ANNOYING coz balloons are very fucked-up things. They explode with a vengence once you stick even a SMALL SMALL CORNER of scrotchtape on it. And as you can imagine, it is very difficult to put the balloons on without letting it touch the scrotchtape at all.

I got one balloon bursting in my face, and another pretending to be ok, hanging on the wall nicely and all, and 3 seconds later burst in my face. KNN!!!

So remember that if you let your scrotchtape touch the balloon, just stick the whole damn tape ON to the balloon and do not, for the love of Zeus, attempt to pluck the scrotchtape out.

After my 2nd balloon burst, Shuyin was smirking because she had only made one balloon burst, and it imploded when she was safely far away from it. I, on the other hand, had a red spot on my lower lip and cheek, evidence of my stupidity.

I stood in a corner sulking, and murmuring curses at her.

THEN A BALLOON OF HERS BURST!!!

She had stepped down from the chair to admire her work, where, from on top, her balloon shot down like a bullet smack onto the middle of her forehead.

I KEPT LAUGHING AND LAUGHING AT HER COZ OF ALL AREAS TO HIT IT HIT HER FOREHEAD AND I TOLD HER IT IS BECAUSE HER FOREHEAD HAS AMPLE SPACE MUAHAHAHAHA!!!

*ahem*

So anyway.

BIG FOREHEAD WHAHAHA! Yeah lar yeah lar I got big forehead also but at least my balloon hit me on my cheek and lips mah wahhaha...

!!!!!!!!!!!!









!!!!!



Got one psychopath looking at us!!

The Teo sisters are very freaky!!

See, this is their right feet.


Notice how long the toes are!















OMG!


*walks away and pretends not to know them*


Abbie (with Daddy) not very good mood coz she didn't have enough sleep...



All these years I knew her I didn't know Shuyin resembled a television so much.


And anyway, my heart-shaped balloon is supposed to represent... Trust me, it looks a lot more like the real thing in real life. Actually we wanted to use the phallic long balloons to represent... Never mind!!




Your friends ah? No no, I dunno them.



HIYAH OK LAR! It's my friend. HAPPY?


HOWARD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY!


HE IS NOW OFFICALLY 29!!! Let's laugh at him coz he is so old!! Hahaha... Anyway, congrats ah Howard - you are now no longer a full-time geek (which I totally dig, btw... did I already mention that Howard can type faster than he speaks?) but a geeky TV host! I'm sure you'll do great old pal, all those girls love you.

So anyway, Howard made us wear golfing attire to his birthday!


The birthday boy! (man, rather,since he is so old now)


Ha! I saw Shan and Howard from like 3 miles away. I must say, the two are totally "onz" for wearing SO MUCH golfing attire. I thought they will just wrap things up with a random cap and a vest, but no...

Check out a secret picture I took of Shan's long legs:


CRAZY RIGHT?! That guy wore PLUS FOURS! If you are a Harry Potter fan you might remember that in GOF a wizard wore plus-fours to the Quidditch World Cup, and I never knew that wearing plus-fours will make you look less muggle-like.

Now Shan made me understand.

Not to be mistaken - his attire does not stop at his knees, which, btw, is about the height of the average person's armpits.

He also wore... a golfing glove, a bright yellow visor, a knitted vest (or polo, I can't remember) - and a thick, thick red-striped Irish-looking scarf which made him look like a Hogwarts student.













I told you, and you didn't believe me.

SINGAPORE FASHION WEEK!


Eileen and I went over to the Arts House for fashion shows!

I met Edwin Yeo there, on my way to watching the GG5 show, and he asked me if I am going to take many photos.

My answer was simple - Yes, if the models are going to be wearing little clothes!! :D


My favourite God-sis! :) MUACKS!


The lights were so pretty...

As were the models...




This one is the lagi best picture I took the whole freaking night ok?!

Click on it to see the totally NSFW version (Kids, you better don't click, or better yet, don't read my blog from now on - it is only for adults. I don't wanna be your role model!!!)



It boggles me to think that she can walk out in (almost) public, wearing that, and totally look comfortable in it... with all the photographers flashing and everything.

But who cares about nudity as long as it is on beautiful people? It is ugly people being nude that people care about, in my humble opinion anyway.

I have no complains!! :D

Do you agree, models?



OH YES THEY DO! :D


Eileen is very tiko, she is stil shooting the nipple model!! Haha

Later...


Shiok, got iDesire!

End of show...


We love you!

SUPPER WITH FRIENDS


After the show I met Huifen for supper at Geylang, then we went to Mustafa to shop!


Something tells me she doesn't like you...





I LOVE DOU JIANG YOU TIAO!!! Especially the Geylang one, it is fabulous can?!

These two pictures taken at Mr Bean's cafe at Selegie before the boys and I went inside the lan shop to play DotA:


Tim trying to act handsome... *ahem*


Huifen and I.


Yeah lar you are very clever lar... Coz you saw I was sucking on a spoon and not a straw right? Why, can't people take candid shots nowadays? Don't tell me you never pretended to suck on a spoon for the sake of a nice photo? So what if you have never? It is a prefectly normal thing to do.

BEN'S COMMISSIONING BALL!



I went to dye my hair pink and cut my fringe short! You know, in conjunction with the new pink blog layout and all? :) I don't care if you think it looks "ah lian" or whatever, I think it is great, and I am always right.


GORGEOUS!


And I went with Ben as his partner to his commissioning ball!


On the cab...


To Rasa Sentosa!



With Ben!
("Why you all always like to take photos and cut off people's hair one ah?")



The food sounds so great! Tenderloin with FOIE GRAS (OMG, MY FAVOURITE) and eggplant caviar?! I cannot wait!

They had this free Glamour Shot thingy. I helped Ben take photos while he was being shot, with my own camera...



See, I take such great photos... When it is my turn and I pass my camera to him?










LIKE SHIT LIKE THAT.



First dish is some lobster with cheese thing... The cheese part (the swirly thing) doesn't taste that great, and I can think of 1001 more fabulous ways to deal with that lobster - like grilling it in cheese, or fruit salad or baked.. instead of having it seemingly just boiled and left to chill.

Once again, ladies and gentlemen, I have been cheated to savour the delightful sensory tastes of a fig. NOT.

FIGS SUCK!!!!!!

Ben ate one of those red things on the side that looks like swivelled labias (obviously only meant for decoration) and exclaimed that it is a ... strawberry.

Men and their delusions. I was like, "No, I'm quite sure it is a fig," and he was like, "No, it's a strawberry!" so I bit into one, and out oozed this strong splash of bitterish sour juice.

KNN.



Ben's friends were cute! No lar, I was trying to play around with the camera. No, really!


Our lime sorbet!



This band called "Stainless Steel" was performing and the lead singer is cute!!! I love dimples!!! :D And I like the si(1) wen(2) bai(4) lei(4) (did I write correctly?) look!! Haha... But Ben says he is attached. What is wrong with the world?!


Poor Ben getting impatient for the main course...




And here it comes!!!





WOOH SHIOK!!

Ok, where is the FOIE GRAS? Dammit, I expected a piece of foie gras, not baby cubes of pate! Grrr!! And I don't even see the caviar!



But to be fair, the tenderloin tasted really superb! It is very tender, and cooked to perfection. The eggplant paste was great too!



A sweet end to this super freaking long blog entry!! I think my photographic skills are becoming better, isn't it? It is, it is! Yay! :D